Parties can often be a minefield of awkwardness. Guests are in an unfamiliar setting, surrounded by people they don’t know, and are eating all kinds of gas-inducing junk food. I think we can all agree: everyone hates parties. That’s why I work so hard to not get invited to any.
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| A party with my ideal guest list. |
On the rare occasion that I do have to go to one, I always make a point to force people to dance. Party-goers are all about blending in and looking cool in front of strangers, so making them bust a move in a room full of people is the perfect way to induce anxiety. Besides, what are you going to do instead, sit comfortably and enjoy an intimate conversation with a new friend?
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| Look at these miserable people. Don't they know that they could be dancing right now? |
I have found that the best way to make someone dance is to drag them into the middle of the room and clap aggressively at them. Who cares if she doesn’t know the song or has a crippling fear of movement? Make sure that lots of people are watching, and disregard any objections that your target makes. Now he is stuck. At this point, refusing to dance would brand him as a wet blanket for the rest of the night. His dignity belongs to you! The last step is to simply enjoy yourself as your new enemy does a half-hearted robot.
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| Yeah...exactly. |
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